It's hard to choose because there have been so many, but here are some of the highlights of our journey (we'll probably keep adding to this list as we think of more and more):

Thank YOU from the bottom of our clown hearts to everyone who helped make this adventure possible!

Our final days at the Edinburgh Festival Fringe:

Monday 
The last final official day of the fringe. We thought it would be appropriate to see one last show and gosh it was a good one. We saw Tes at Underbelly (another one of the big four venues). It was beautifully crafted, written and performed by Steve Larkin. We found out after that it had gotten some not-the-most-awesome reviews which just shows to go you how strange reviews can be, because it was well deserving of huge audiences and five stars. In our humble opinions... 

Monday is the day that fringe lies on the ground and gives into expiration. The streets are suddenly dead. You can't get a pre-show double espresso because the food trucks are closed. Everything is going into hibernation for its long winters nap. BUT WAIT. There are still shows on so WHY is everything closing? It's so sad and confusing.  Apparently, we are told, we made a rookie mistake booking a show today because no one who has been before would subject themselves to having a show on this audience-less day. Just as we were feeling like we had made a grave mistake, we saw our three friends Harry, Bailey, and Munir who told us they bought a cookbook, and then we saw more friends who came to our show for the third time - WE LOVE YOU!!!

Oh, and we found out that we got 5 stars from Tiger Paws which is great. AND we were awarded a "Bouquet" from Bouquets & Brickbats. They only give out twelve for the whole festival so that's pretty awesome. All those things made us feel much better and we had a wonderful warm and fun last show at Edinburgh Fringe 2015. 

After the show we rushed out to the annual fireworks. At the end of the fest every year, they do a massive fireworks display with a full orchestra. These were unlike any fireworks we have ever seem. They kept going and going and getting bigger and more spectacular... for a full hour. A whole HOUR.... of fireworks... from a castle.... with live music... from a castle... AHHHHHH!!!

We got some last fish and chips and went to find some friends to say goodbye to. We danced the night away until about 5am when we finally passed out with sore feet, happy hearts and glowing noses from the run that we had completed. 

Tuesday
We went to the theatre bright and early - after stopping at Visitor Hugo's to get a breakfast sandwich (it was the first place we went when we got here so we thought it would be fitting to return on our last day). We packed up our trusty toilet into its box and cabbed it over to Homebase where they said we could return it after the show. We did just that, and with a final goodbye, got our full refund and left our toilet to go on and make some other people happy. It was certainly good to us for the duration of our time together (and luckily we never crashed it into the stage during our epic finale). We packed up our suitcases, cleaned our flat and then set off to the Ritz where we spent the night in semi-luxury. The hotel had a bit of an identity crisis and couldn't decide if it wanted to live in the past or in the present so it was a big mishmash of furniture and strange decor including a book on cats, displayed prominently in the main staircase from the foyer. It was grand though, and we were glad to be there. There were free shortbreads in the room too which we couldn't refuse. 

After a long day of cleaning we were two hungry clowns so we let our feet find a delicious place to eat. The winner was a Turkish/Kurdish restaurant where the owner was standing outside pitching the restaurant with great love and pride, and knowing what that feels like having pitched our show hundreds of times a day for the past month, we decided to try it. When we asked what was best, the man told us, "I'll surprise you", and brought us various small dishes (Mezes) of many things so we could try it all.  It was indeed the best Kurdish/Turkish food that we have EVER had. Then after dinner, he announced that it was his birthday so he gave everyone in the restaurant shots of Turkish Sambuca and taught us all how to dance a traditional Kurdish dance. HOW EXCITING! 

Soon after, we headed back to the confused but magical hotel, got into our jammers, and set off two confetti crackers (a red and a blue) to celebrate our adventure. We fell asleep in our kitschy room at the Ritz with the alarm set for a few hours later so we could rise and head home. A journey complete. Our clown hearts happy. 

There is lots to catch up on. It's been a busy week so far, trying to fit in everything including getting the right people to come to our show, having meetings with presenters, seeing other shows and taking over the city...and the world... 

Sunday was  the big international 'Industry Brunch' where we schmoozed and tried to win over the hearts of international presenters by looking deep into their eyes and sending subliminal messages about how they need us in their lives. Clown love. 

Afterwards, we were super hungry and went to the Assembly courtyard which was a like a hippie commune with lounging bodies strewn about all over because it was a sunny day (there is only one or two of those a year in Edinburgh so everyone comes out to play). There are a plethora of food trucks in the garden so we went to the Alpine dumpling place that makes vegetarian dumplings. They also gave us free strudel which was so delicious and smothered in cream and sprinkled with icing sugar. It was a windy day so the sugar was soon all over Morro's face and it looked like we had just performed Go Bake Yourself. 

That night we had a dream audience that included some people that we met at the Industry brunch so maybe our subliminal messaging is working.  We also got to meet The Boy with Tape on his Face and saw AFVS that had so many stars in the lineup including our friend Puddles and Lili la Scala, who is so glittery and wonderful. We had pizza with them afterwards and it was kind of like we were the little sisters that got to tag along with the cool older crowd because they have been doing Edinburgh Fringe for nine years. 

On Monday morning our producer Derrick arrived, so we took him to Kilimanjaro for a welcome brunch.  After our afternoon/evening of emails, flyering and performing the show we met up with the brilliant and hilarious Rosamund Small, who is in town visiting family and seeing shows. We had Thai food with her and fun laughs at a restaurant where the bathroom looks like a dungeon prison cell. 

Later that night, we saw The Boy With Tape On His Face perform his X-Mas special show and it was magical. He makes a big mess on stage, just like we do in our shows, so we are pretty sure that we are soul mates and will be good friends from now on. 

On Tuesday we performed again on the Royal Mile. Lots of people watched us performed and one man who had also come to see our show asked for our autograph afterwards. We stayed there for a while and flyered people, and dogs even (shar peis to be exact). Jasp danced with a statue who made her cry because he was so beautiful and gave her a flower. We made some videos - during which people gathered around and watched which was funny because we were not even trying to flyer but it worked. After three hours, we decided it was time for a break and got some delicious bubble tea before heading off to our show. 

After the show (which was magically wonderful) we rushed home later for a flatmates b-day party at which we had delicious cake. Jasp realized that she left her show dress at theatre and had to rush back to find it. It wasn't in the bathroom where she thought it was and the theatre door was locked so after much stress and searching for people to help, a technician finally let her in and her dress was there - Thank goodness. To celebrate she did a shot of tequila with Peta, one of our favourite new friends.

Wednesday (yesterday) we walked around New Town which was a whole other festival - not actually but it feels like it.  We got to see our name in big glowing LED lights on the tix booth sign. The booth is like TO TIX or TKTS in NY or London but for the fringe and it says Virgin. We met a person on the street who wanted a selfie then he turned out to be a presenter from India who wants to see our show  - you just never know who you will meet here. 
 
After our show we ran home to get our uke, witnessed a dance party on the street, did some busking under a bridge, and then performed at Pollyanna Cabaret (they had us back again). It was super fun and edgy because it was at a super cool bar and the host, Pollyfilla, is awesome-sauce. 

Today we have meetings and are equipped with rain gear and love. The days are going so fast and the weather and our moods are changing by the minute. So soon we will be home and it will all be a distant memory, but for now we still have so much to take in. Soaking up the moments...

We still haven't climbed the mountain because every time we go to do it it starts raining. 

On Thursday we instead took the opportunity to eat a lot and see some great shows: To She Or Not To She  and Raz. They were both one person shows and totally different and totally awesome. We ate at Kilimanjaro which is a coffee and breakfast place. It is totally winning the best breakfast place award (so far). 

We spent an hour stapling reviews onto our flyers because that's how you get people to come to the show here. You have to prove that other people say it's good for anyone to even consider seeing it because there are so many shows to choose from. It's getting really tricky now because there are so many good shows and everyone seems to have great reviews. 
 
After our show - which was totally fun and there were even some people that came back again and brought friends - we went to perform at Cafe Baile Cabaret. We got lost on the way and a nice guy tried to help us find our way with his GPS phone. We made it just in time to sneak through the back of the audience during a really dramatic piece of theatre about women that were missing. We tried to be really sneaky so no one would notice us but they brought us through at kind of the worst moment possible. 
The cabaret was JAW DROPPING. There were soooooo many cool acts that made our minds spin in awe and amazement. There was a samurai drumming group from Japan and dancers from Korea to name a couple... and us. It was such an honour to be there with all those incredibleamazingawesome performers from all around the world. Going on after a giant dance spectacle is in interesting thing...but the audience seemed to warm to our charms pretty quickly and then they all wanted our flyers - yay!

In a bizarre shift of events, Morro wanted to come home and sleep and Jasp wanted to party on the town. We did a bit of both and after some veggie gyoza Morro went to write about some adventures and sleep and Jasp stayed out schmoozing with other performers. 

Friday started off with a photo shoot for an article about if you were in prison and it was your last show before you get executed - pretty morbid but we did it. 

We did lots more stapling and then took a break to see a show before flyering.  We saw Moby Alpha - We usually see Chuck and Charlie (the guys in the show) each and every day somewhere around the city. It was fun to finally see their show and we totally recommend it especially if you are into sci-fi stuff and/or Moby Dick. But really, it's just downright awesome.

We decided to make flyering fun today by getting fairy floss (aka cotton candy) and sharing it with people. Then we had one of the best shows ever. We are super in love with the audience that was there and some people that came back yesterday sent some friends and they are amazing. They told us that we should have a TV show which we totally agree with. Also we found out that they are doing a show called Peter Pan but sadly they are leaving tomorrow. They invited us to come perform in their theatre in Stratford - like the original one where Shakespeare is from - so that is the best thing ever.

After the show we celebrated with gin and cucumbers because that is what they told us to do at the bar. Also Jasp had a haggis burger. We hung out the Mark Forward (he is totally famous) and with Jarred Christmas (he is also totally famous) and we saw Jarred's show where he transformed into the sky and made us laugh a lot. Then we did a guest spot at the show Massaoke where we sang "I Think We're Alone Now" with the band and basically felt like rockstars. If you want to go to a seriously fun party - this is the show for you. It was THE BEST! We danced the night away.  Sleepy clowns, we got home really late and  couldn't sleep because we were so excited. There is so much to do and so little time. How quickly a month can fly. 

Dreams

To all the boys and girls and clowns that have dreams. 
Dreaming is all good. 
Dreams fill up your heart with love and joy and the joie to vivre. 
Keep those dreams safe, don't let anyone tell you you shouldn't. 
Feed them, let them run around and grow as they need to.
Let them expand and transform into new dreams that are even bigger and bolder.
Let them have a life of their own - as all dreams should.
But remember, just keep in mind, the bigger they get the harder you have to work for them.
It make you love them even more... and it makes you need them even more.
You become inseparable - attached beyond repair.
But know that after a certain point (a point which is difficult to pinpoint but a point nonetheless)
they (those dreams) are in fact the ones that are in charge of you.

Two days of hard work. We were back pounding the pavements on Tuesday. It was raining and we were on our way to an interview with Fresh Fringe (it's a radio program). We were running behind and getting soaked so we tried to hail a cab. Countless ones passed and we flailed at them desperately, just to realize that they already had passengers. We had made it most of the way there when a cab finally pulled over for us, at which point there was nearly no need. 

We had a great chat on the radio about being edgy and political as well as how taboo the female body is - especially in the UK (the host said that part not us). Basically we showed them that clowns have brains as well as being funny. After the interview, the hosts were both extra excited to come and see the show so hopefully it worked for everyone listening too.

The interview was proceed by a pakora wrap form the Jingle Bus (one of the many food venders at the fringe), the usual flyering (which is pretty hard in the rain) and our show. It was a delicious one. People laughed and even stood at the end (which apparently, we are told, is not a thing they do here in the UK). Some famous people, like Mark Forward and Jarred Christmas, even came to the show so that was fun. They told us they really liked it which made us happy all the way from our toes.

Wednesday, we woke up early to perform on one of the many stages of the Royal Mile. After your twenty minutes you can flyer and invite people to the show - it's like putting a fishbowl in the middle of a coral reef where no matter how cool the fish in the bowl are, there are also hundreds of other fish around that are also cool. There are living brass statues of Hemingway works, bag pipers piping, a group of monks singing, farm animals covered in glitter, fairy princesses, stilt walkers, magicians, jugglers... it's like the 12 days of Christmas except times a thousand, in the summer and on drugs - it's everything that you can imagine and more. We sang some songs with the uke, including Royals because we were on the Royal Mile. So many people came to watch and laugh and clap. We were amazed that so many came and stopped considering the madness surrounding them - but it seemed like we reeled them in with our invisible clown fishing line.

After singing our hearts out and and telling all 8 thousand people on the royal mile about our show - or trying our best to - we thought it would be fun to get some pasta. We happened past an Italian restaurant called Lucano's that had homemade pasta on the menu. It looked perfect. There was a line so we stood in it excited to treat ourselves. A server came up to us and looked at us with a strange look. "It'll be a half hour wait", he said with a little bit of a snark then walking away abruptly. I don't think he likes us Jasp noted. "No", Morro said defending him, "he is probably just having a busy day". He came up again, "Are you sure you want to wait thirty minutes?" He gave us a nasty look. Morro realized that Jasp was right.  "Yes we do", said Morro confidently. "Fine", he stormed off and got his supervisor who came over. The supervisor took the door handle and opening  it he motioned towards the street. "I'm afraid of clowns." He clearly wasn't - we have met a lot of people who are actually afraid of clowns and that is not how they act. They obviously wanted us to leave so we did, and we won't be returning as they clearly have a problem with clowns (it's an official boycott).  Haven't they seen the movie "Pretty Woman"? They clearly don't know who we might be in a few years.  

Wounded, we walked down the street longing for good pasta. We passed another Italian restaurant. Jasp went in to see if we could get a table. Morro was afraid so stayed outside, which turned out to be a good instinct because when Jasp asked if we could dine there they actually said NO. We went into yet a third Italian restaurant and as soon as we entered the door a lady said the food was no good. Not sure at this point if we was trying to save us from bad food, or just trying to get rid of us, we figured that we were clearly not meant to have Italian food on this particular day. Later, we found a really great place called Knights Kitchen. They were so super friendly and had a variety of delicious African dishes including chickpea and mango curry. It was delectable meal - better than pasta!!!!

Insert here the usual pre-show flyering (where Jasp got flyered by a dead squirrel) and performance. If you have been reading along you may remember that we mentioned our tech ran away. Well, this did happen and ever since we have had three different technicians learn our show. They are thrown into the show, have to call it having never practiced, learn it after a few shows and once they finally have it they are told they are being switched with someone else. So tonight we had another new tech again and he did a great job considering he doesn't get any practice but of course it is a pretty hard thing to do, so it was pretty messy. But we still love him. Alas it's not like we are paying them a lot of money for... oh wait we are...

We tried to go to get a drink after and got kicked out of our seats for some more famous people. Sometimes being a clown just doesn't cut it. 

We are going to climb a mountain tomorrow and let mother nature nurture us. 

We missed yesterday's blog so we have some catching up to do: 

Sunday was an early morning for a Fringe Networking brunch where we met some pretty cool people from around the world. We were sleepy and still licking our wounds from the night before, so after the brunch we had a rest at home and pumped ourselves up for our show with chocolate (the milk chocolate is soooo good here). As we were flyering, Morro found some chocolate cake that was delicious and shared it with some strangers on the street - people really bond over food anywhere you go.  We met some people that already saw the show and they were so excited to see us and tell us it was "brilliant" and then asked if they could have some flyers to help us pass them out. Also, we saw a girl who said she was at the show 'last night' and loved it and could hear her friend behind her "laughing the whole time" - even though we thought everyone in the audience on Saturday night hated us (apparently we were wrong). Sometimes people are awesome - other times they aren't - but most of the time they are awesome. Sunday night we had a super fun audience with some repeat customers (who brought new friends to share the show with) and we all had a really great time together. 

Afterwards we went to Die Roten Punkte's Haus Party, where they almost burned the building down and danced the night away. It was the most fun. If anyone wants to see it they can because it's happening again next Sunday night. 

Monday - The long awaited day off.  We made it to the halfway mark. WAHOOOOOO!!!!! We decided to celebrate with a mini vacation. 

On the train to Glasgow, as we were whisked through the Scottish countryside we passed what seemed like an endless amount of sheep peacefully grazing in the fields. "Look at the sheeps," shrieked Morro.  "Oh wow " replied Jasp, "they look so tiny and delicious". Morro began to cry and made Jasp promise that she wouldn't eat any sheep today. 

We got off the train and followed our feets wherever they took us. We jumped onto a sight seeing tour bus and drank unfiltered cider at Curlers Rest (the oldest pub in Glasgow). We had afternoon tea with scones and clotted cream at the Glasgow Botanic Gardens (Jasp said she was in paradise even though cows and cream are not generally the first things equated with the tropics). We explored the Kelvingrove Art Gallery and Museum (where the word "beautifullest" was used to describe Glasgow - Morro felt good about having used it for all these years), investigated some mysterious back alleys that led to secret vintage and record shops,  experienced Victorian suburbs (which are super fancy), and got to see gothic churches that had been converted into pubs and theatres (where they serve "a pie , a pint and a play"). 

On the train ride back we had a philosophical conversation about the movie The Little Mermaid: 
MORRO: I think Ariel is pretty greedy. She has all sorts of gadget and gismos and  still wants more... Maybe she needs to meditate. 
JASP: She's not greedy, Morro, she just wants to assimilate and conform to fit in with society  and abandon her own personal identity in order to have a fleeting chance with a man she doesn't know. 
MORRO: Oh...

We got back to Edinburgh just in time for Vanessa Smythe's show, In Case We Disappear, at Moriarty's. It made us both cry because it was so touching and funny and honest and full of love and touched our hearts like a beautiful kiss. You gotta see it. 

We walked home after some lovely time with fellow Canadian performers, and made a plan for tomorrow when it all gets started again. It was a good rest and now we are ready to take on Edinburgh again. 

Sometimes you find yourselves in a different part of the world and discovering all of its wonders. Yesterday we did that. We ran down the street late for a meeting. Singing with glee and asking for directions as we scurried through the streets, people parted, pointing out the way as we passed. We made it just on time to meet Graham Clark at an Edinburgh favourite, Mary's Milk Bar. There was a line up (or queue, as they call it here) down the street and around the corner. It was totally worth the wait because we got to take "us"ies with Graham and the castle (which was in the background) and play some uke songs. They have something called "The Challenge" which is ten scoops of ice-cream but Jasp wouldn't let Morro order it. We both ordered hot chocolate floats instead which is the most amazing chocolate that you can imagine and then home-made fresh ice cream on top. Yes, it is as good as it sounds... better actually. It was un-imaginably-amazingly delicious. 

Then we played for a bit and wandered around to the music shop, where Jasp got a giant harmonica because she was feeling like she wanted to be musical too. Morro keeps calling it a toddler's harmonica which is actually maybe what it is intended to be but it still sounds pretty good and Jasp learned how to play Auld Lang Syne from the instruction sheet. It sounds great! We tried on some Scottish hats and contemplated scaling the cliffside up to the castle - Morro is convinced that this is achievable. Jasp will keep reminding her that the castle was built so that people couldn't scale it, but Morro is stubborn... or determined (depending on how you look at it).

We met so many nice people on the streets, some of whom offered us food (Jasp ate some random guy's deep fried haggis and chips), others who recognized us from our show and wanted to talk about it and take pictures with us. Then we decided to sit on the street and play some uke songs. As we were singing away people came by to say hi or take a flyer for the show. One lady even gave us a pound and said "You are special". That warmed our hearts, which was good because two minutes later some girl came up to tell us we couldn't sing in the area. We could flyer here, but not sing... weird. We moved down the street to where artistic expressions were allowed, and sang some more. 

Our show had a full house - two tickets away from being sold-out. There was something strange in the air this Saturday night at the fringe, however. Something that made people tired or uninspired or mean. We like to give our audiences the benefit of the doubt - if they are quiet, we assume they are just inside laughers, or they are tired, or that they just need to warm up a bit. Last night was the first time in the history of ever where it felt like the audience just didn't want to play. Like someone had forced them to be there. Like they were mad that they had to be at the theatre. We found out later that Saturday night has a strange vibe because a lot of people are drinking. We also found out later that some other people had similar audiences last night. We still don't feel better about it, though. It made our hearts sad.

We ate our feelings... we mean some nachos, and drank some gin because that is what they recommend at the bar. They have good gin here. Then we decided we would see a show to make us feel better. We saw Graham Clark open for the Pyjama Men in Pterodactyl Nights. It even said Morro and Jasp on our tickets because they had some reserved for us (if you look in the bottom left hand corner of the tix you can see our names). It's pretty special when your names are on the same ticket as the Pyjama Men because they are pretty awesome, as is Graham Clark who painted a picture of Donald Trump with his beard. The show was so fun and felt like medicine and reminded us that laughter does exist in the world despite the show we had two hours earlier. Tomorrow is another day full of smiles and medicine, right? Right??